Shut your mouth and listen

"When I tell her about something that is difficult, she starts to fix the problems she think I have.

I said it only because along with her it's easier to talk about it and examine it from different angles and find my own way through it all.

I wish that she could stand just to sit with me without being so busy helping me solve it. It's as if she thinks it is wrong that I have the difficulties in the first place..."

The above sigh I've heard several times from people who had well-meaning friends and family who all wanted to help, but instead made it harder.

Listening, be spacious and present with a person with problems is not always easy.

For we are often driven by a great desire to help and move the person away from that place to a better place. We think we know where that better place is.

But actually the person himself os the only one who can really find the solution that is true.

And YOU can help by being present, offering  peace and acceptance and non-judgment.

In that room you allow the other person to go the step further than she/he was'nt able to walk alone.

Therefore, sit on your hands, close your mouth and turn your ears up. Be present. And mindful.

Then you are the best helper.

Always remember to play ... ❤️

Vianne

03.12.2016

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